Former hotel staffer Jacob Tomsky has detailed the sketchy, raunchy, and sometimes scandalous things that hotel workers do when guests’ heads are turned in his new book, Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustlers and So-Called Hospitality.
After 11 years in the industry, including a couple years at a high-end hotel in New Orleans and several years at a luxury hotel in Manhattan, Jacob Tomsky says he’s come to know the dark underbelly of the hospitality industry.
Jacob Tomsky writes that long hours and rude guests lead staffers to seek an outlet for their frustration through mischief – which sometimes involves plotting revenge against the wealthy jerks they are forced to accommodate.
“A lot of people are watching <<Downton Abbey>> now, and they think, <<Oh, I’ve got servants, too!>>” Jacob Tomsky told the New York Post.
“Especially the affluent. They treat people as they never would otherwise. Meanwhile, hardworking people – who might be getting screwed – won’t say anything. It’s the people who have way more money who want everything now, and they want it for free.”
Daily shortcomings in cleanliness are commonplace, Jacob Tomsky says.
The dirty secrets that luxury hotels don’t want you to know revealed by Jacob Tomsky
Duvets are never cleaned. The covers sometimes are – but the duvets? Never.
Drinking glasses are not washed with soap and water, but shined up with furniture polish to make them sparkle like new.
For particularly difficult guests, a staffer might seek revenge on their toothbrush or even change their key card to lock them out of their room – something that gave the overworked employees a small sliver of pleasure when the exasperated guest approached the front desk for a new card.
Jacob Tomsky said he also came across staffers who stole from minibars and from valet-parked cars.
Often, the mischief that staffers engaged in was purely out of boredom, he said.
“I’ve worked a month straight without a day off,” he said, describing “the mind-numbing boredom of an overnight shift”.
Boredom led to rifling through guests’ stuff, reading intimate information about them and giggling over their collections of sex toys.
“I found a pretty foul letter left in a room,” he said.
“It was about someone’s wife being a whore. It was probably a joke, because there was a stamp on it of genitalia, addressed to a Mr. Cuckold, with details about her sexual activities.”
Jacob Tomsky’s book is a warning, as well as a wake-up call, to hotel guests. He offers some suggestions for dealing with hotel staffers in a way that won’t leave you with a soiled toothbrush and a deactivated key card. As expected, those suggestions typically involve a generous tip for the staffer.
He has since quit the hotel industry and immediately sought anger management therapy to recover from his decade in the business.
A discussion on online community site Reddit has revealed a series of gripes, handy tips and confessions about things to look out for by hotel workers.
It followed a question posted by user Smadisond on Tuesday. The site user asked: “Hotel staff of Reddit, what is something that hotels keep from their guests?”
1. Whisky is yellow… but so is urine
Among the tales was a hotel worker in Sweden telling how she stumbled upon a guest’s sneaky attempt to dodge a minibar bill – by refilling an empty whisky bottle with urine.
Current and former hotel staffers from around the world contributed to the discussion on Reddit.
2. Suspect stains… gone with a quick wipe
One employee told how in training she was directed to simply “wipe” a suspicious white stain off the duvet with a “damp cloth, until you can’t see it anymore”.
The traumatized hotel trainee’s advice was steer clear of anything but the sheets.
3. Dirty hotel room glasses? Rinse in bathroom sink and dry with pillow case
One former housekeeper admitted to simply rinsing glasses in the bathroom sink then drying them with a clean pillow case – and that was only if they looked dirty.
A discussion on online community site Reddit has revealed a series of gripes, handy tips and confessions about things to look out for by hotel workers
4. Hair, hair, everywhere
A hotel maid said her major gripe is when guests leave behind an almost unimaginable amount of hair. Especially when it “just keep coming”.
5. You try completely cleaning a room in just 15 minutes
Also on the subject of cleaning, one user said the hotel where they worked allotted only 15 minutes per room so if things didn’t look as if they’d been cleaned it’s likely that they weren’t.
6. One room, one simple rule
An employee at a top hotel told Reddit that people wanting just one room should avoid online travel sites.
He said third parties often charge more than the hotel’s actual rate so people should book directly because if there are vacancies, they’re willing to bargain.
“If you are just reserving a room, you’re getting the short stick,” he said.
7. Need to cancel without paying a fee? Think ahead
Another useful tip was on how to avoid paying a cancellation fee when you have to ditch a reservation at the last minute.
A receptionist said a clever solution is to call the hotel and push your reservation forward a few weeks. Then, call back later that day and cancel.
8. The night-time credit card con
One thing to look out for is a scam used by hackers who pose as front-desk workers calling late at night to persuade half-awake guests that they suddenly need a credit card.
According to hotel workers, the front desk won’t ever call late at night.
9. Make friends with the all-powerful bellman
When it comes to getting perks at a hotel, one bellman at a Hilton in Arizona has also revealed all.
He said advised people to ask for everything from free water bottles to cigarettes, shuttle rides to pizza because bellmen might have the power to grant it.
10. Ritz-Carlton goes the extra mile
According to another former high-end employee, at a Ritz-Carlton hotel, the chain has a $1,500 “special employee allowance” to be used at their discretion for improving a guest’s stay.
The employee witnessed the purchase of a new Rolex for a guest whose own watch had gone missing days before.
