This week’s episode of Duck Dynasty showed Si Robertson feeling neglected by his family.
Uncle Si Robertson decided to draw some attention to himself by accidentally-on-purpose forcing his nephew Willie to bump into the front his truck in the Duck Commander parking lot.
“Hey, are you going to pay for this?” asked Si Robertson, pointing to the non-existent damage to his bumper.
Willie Robertson looked at dent-free bumper and shrugged: “Pay for what?”
“Look,” declared Si Robertson, wagging his finger.
“You’re going to pay for this. It’s probably going to run you $3,500.”
After a brief debate, Willie Robertson dismissed his uncle and got into his truck: “Yeah, whatever, Si.”
“You’ll be hearing from my lawyer,” warned Uncle Si.
The next day, John Godwin, Justin Martin, Jase Robertson and his brother Jep are inside Duck Commander HQ, debating the potential reproductive capabilities of mermaids. Willie Robertson arrived and learned that Si was at the doctor’s office.
“For what,” Willie asked dubiously.
“Is he sick?”
“Nah,” said Jase Robertson.
“After y’all had your wreck.”
Willie Robertson’s wife Korie came in the warehouse to announce that there was “a man outside and he said he’s here to deliver Si”.
“What is he, a pizza,” Willie cracked.
The crew went outside to see Si Robertson grandly exit out of a minivan and down a motorized ramp in his brand-new, bright blue mobility scooter.
“Si, get off that thing,” said Willie Robertson.
“I can’t,” replied Uncle Si.
“I got back damage – I’ve got residual nerve damage in my back. It compressed two or three vertebra back there – I likely broke my neck.”
Willie Robertson was not especially convinced of Si’s injuries.
“About once a year, Si comes up with some stupid excuse to miss work,” he explained.
“Last year, he was on crutches for two weeks before I finally broke down and made him employee of the month.”